A Support Network As You Age

A Support Network As You Age – We All Need Somebody

Having a support network is important at any time of life but it becomes increasingly important in later life. For some people, whose adult children or grandchildren live nearby and are happy to help, a quick phone call is all that’s required, and help can be on hand in a short space of time. However, that’s not the case for everybody.

According to Ageing Well Without Children, one in ten people over the age of 60 have no children. Others have children who are unwilling to offer help and support because they are estranged or have no contact. And some may have had children, but those children have either predeceased them, have care needs of their own, or are unable to offer help or support because they live far away. And, the number of people over 65 without adult children is set to rise from over 1.2 million to 2 million by 2030 increasing the demands on wider support networks.

Making sure there are people nearby who can help when they’re needed was front of mind for Tim and Angela when they decided to move to The Spindles in Menston.

Angela: “We were planning ahead and thinking, if we need some help, we need people that we can rely on. Our daughter lives in Germany now with her husband and two boys. And our son is in Canada, with his wife and two children. They were getting worried that we’re getting old and had no support around us.”

Tim: “I think that was a big reason for Angela. She was worried that if anything happened to me, she didn’t want to be on her own. Either in an emergency or long term.”

Tim: “In our old house I remember once I stumbled and fell in the drive. I was shouting. I couldn’t get up and people who were walking past came and helped me up.”

Angela: “The same thing happened to me one day. We’d had a delivery of logs, and I trod on a log, slipped and ended up flat on my back on the stone drive. Fortunately, our next-door neighbour had his windows open and heard me shouting, and a lady who’d been walking past came running up the drive. She happened to be a nurse, and our neighbour was a physiotherapist, so they got me up.”

Tim: “Now if anything were to happen, we can just press a button, and the duty manager would rush to help. That sort of facility at our age is ideal. Especially when you haven’t got any family nearby.”

Cath, who moved to The Sidings in Lytham in February 2023, enjoys the peace of mind that her move has given her and her children.

“Having somebody available 24 hours a day is extremely important. You know there’s help on hand if required. I find that very reassuring.

“It’s good for my daughter and my son too. It’s as important for them as it is for me. They know that there is somebody around if I should need any assistance. It takes the weight off their shoulders.

“I haven’t required any care support but it’s very reassuring again that there is that option if you need it in the future.”

Cath also appreciates not having to worry about the maintenance or upkeep of the building.

“I knew that the upkeep of the house and garden would be a burden if I was there on my own. I knew that the house was 50 years old and there were things that needed doing to it and I would have been unable to cope with getting that sorted. So having that weight taken off your shoulders is very good.”

It’s not just the support in an emergency that’s important. David, who moved to The Spindles in Menston in April 2024, finds the everyday reassurance useful too.

“It’s good to have people to bounce things off. For example, I got something purporting to be from Royal Mail about trying to deliver a parcel and it asked for my date of birth. Suddenly I thought, why do you need my date of birth? I was fairly certain it was a scam, but that’s the sort of thing I can just go downstairs and talk to the manager about to see what they think.”

Being part of a vibrant community, surrounded by new friends has made a world of difference to Jane, who moved to The Sidings in November 2022.

“I knew that once my husband Barry died, I needed to look after myself. I also knew that my Mum lived to 102 and therefore I wanted to have something that occupied my mind. Your own company gets worse as you get older. It’s not good to spend too much time on your own.

The main draw for Jane was the prospect of being part of an active community.

“I have lunch in the restaurant every day apart from Tuesdays and Fridays. And we have a wonderful coffee lounge. It’s where we commune. When I go down there, I don’t come back up for four hours.

“I’ve made so many new friends. I call them my family now. Most of us have got family too, but they’re busy. I never want my children to say ‘I better go and visit my mother’. I hate to think that they feel like they have to. To me, this is much better. I got exactly what I bargained for, if not more, when I came here.”

If you’re worried about how you or a loved one might cope as they age, a retirement community may be a good option to consider. In this article we explore whether a retirement community might be the right choice.

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